Study Finds Major Personality Differences Between Single and Coupled People

A new study conducted is shaking up common misconceptions when it comes to single people, who are often portrayed in TV and movies as social butterflies leading exciting lives and going on dates; or alternately, lonely and miserable because they’re unable to find a partner. Instead, as it turns out, most singles are just fine with their relationship status, and many are that way by choice.

In the study, recently published in the Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, researchers at the University of Toronto sought to examine the link between personality traits and relationship status. And what they found was that how introverted or extroverted a person is had the tendency to align with whether that individual was single or in a relationship.

In coming up with the findings, the team recruited over 1,800 participants between the ages of 20 and 59 who had either been single or in a relationship for at least six months. Participants then completed questionnaires that gauged personality traits, satisfaction with their relationship status, and both sexual and life satisfaction.

Researchers then used the “Big Five” model of personality to assign traits to participants. Many psychologists believe that there are five basic types of personalities which include extroversion (outgoing and high-energy), agreeableness (compassionate and respectful), conscientiousness (productive and dependable), neuroticism (anxious and depressed), and openness (curious and creative).

Where participants fell on the introversion and extraversion scale was found to have a strong correlation to whether an individual was be single or in a relationship. In other words, singles tended to be more introverted and those in relationships leaned extrovert.

“As marriage rates decline and more people live alone, our study contributes to a more complex picture of single lives that goes beyond the misleading stereotype of the miserable single person,” said the study’s lead author Elaine Hoan; a Ph.D. candidate in in the lab of Geoff MacDonald and a professor in the university’s department of psychology in the Faculty of Arts & Science.

“While on average people in relationships are more satisfied with their lives than single people, there are many happy singles—relationships don’t play as big of a role in one’s overall life satisfaction as you may think,” Hoan continued. “We found that personality, more than relationship status, determines who is happy with their life and who isn’t.”

She said that often, because the world caters to extroverts, introverts are often misrepresented as antisocial. 

“The reality is, introverts enjoy their alone time and independence, and can emotionally regulate,” Hoan explained. “Meaning, they can manage their reactions to their feelings on their own. So, an introvert may prefer being single more than being in a relationship.”

However, one stereotype holds true in that extroverts are generally happier than introverts, regardless of relationship status. The very quality of being introverted might make it more difficult to find a partner because introverts tend to not find themselves in social situations as often. Not to mention, being in a relationship may cause introverts to become more extroverted by boosting their confidence and providing them with a wider social circle.

Food for thought for anyone out there searching for “the one.” In the meantime, those looking for ways to cope with being single can focus on strengthening friendships, or enjoying their freedom while it lasts.